Gone are the years of New Year’s Resolutions. For the last few years, I have instead chosen a focus word for the year.
2018’s word was Flow.
The word showed up in many ways. I started yoga teacher training and engaged in the flow of yoga. I tried to practice acceptance and going with the flow of life and its ups and downs. On many occasions, I found obstacles to the flow. Perhaps, that is how the word helped me grow.
Now on to 2019. For many years, I beat myself up with high expectations. I would burn myself out or set my expectations so high they were doomed to fail. I would counteract this extreme drive with the halting of everything – too tired to even move.
I’ve learned in several ways this year, that self-compassion takes me as far or farther than pushing myself to the breaking point ever did. Does this mean I don’t make the hard decisions or that I give up? No – it means I do everything with a sense of care. I give myself some grace. I allow myself to learn without punishing myself.
I give myself extra goodness instead of taking away something. I eat more vegetables instead of yelling at myself for eating chocolate. When I’m tired, I take a nap or a bath or a walk. I’m gentler with myself and consequently with others.
So, in 2019 – I choose to Nurture myself. This is the year I stop listening to myself – all of the judgments, fear and worries and I start talking to myself with a little bit of love.
Like a plant, I will water myself and feed myself with positivity. I will be patient with myself and not rip myself out of the ground when I don’t see results right away.
I will wait with faith knowing that the good will come in time.